Communication

Within my speech pattern and strong level of communication is hidden an understanding of miscommunication mainly because I witnessed first hand a complete butchering of the English language. I am not making fun by any means and the reason I am not making fun is because the English language really makes no sense in many instances. Yes my grandmother has been banned from using the word sheet - at least in public and yes I was often left scratching my head when everyone kept saying him or he instead of she or her and vice versa. I mean I never knew who anyone was every talking about and who was coming over for dinner. Let's take some simple things like house; more than one house - houses. Now let's take mouse, spelled the same where as the first letter is the only difference. Why then is more than one mouse not mouses and why is it mice. Why not house - hice? Goose - geese but moose - moose not meese? Tooth - teeth but booth - booths not beeth? Wish - wishes but fish - fish not fishes? Who is in charge over there anyway and why all this nonsense - no wonder why my uncle is "looken forwards to becomes retarteds". So - I do not laugh at them, I applaud them because they speak the best they can and that English language is some difficult sheet to understand sometimes, huh? Imagining what I sound like when I speak all the other languages I have learned. I must be saying that I want to sleep on freezing clean shits and then I will be banned in public. I never correct them as this is who they are and I could really give 2 sheets and when my uncle is "retarteds" I will still scratch my head but will always accept and applaud his effort but I will take him aside and tell him that he can not call everyone a solamabeach corksoaker mudderfalker full of blueship bastages all while scratching his bells. But who am I to really say anything, if I had my choice I would have a monkey as a pet dress him up in a diaper so he doesn’t dump in his hand and throw it at people, make him climb on the counter so I do not have to fall down trying to get a glass, name him Little Big Mister King Kong Swings Alot, make him wear a yellow and red “monkamania” tank top and make him carry a man purse around when we go places so I do not have to have anything in my pockets.